Other People's Venom

   Are there times when you are stressing about something and you think you are doing okay or think you have support and then someone close to you says something that makes you feel even worse? I had to deal with infertility issues. I thought I was doing good and had accepted that I wasn't going to get pregnant and then someone very close to me, who knew everything I had been through, told me it was a good thing I couldn't get pregnant. Turns out, I wasn't doing good at all. I was still hurting deep down and hadn't accepted it as much as I thought I had.

  Another one I have dealt with is when looking for a new job. It drives me crazy when someone says, "Just find a new job, it's easy." It isn't easy at all. You have to look through a bunch of different websites, then you have to follow the employer's instructions on how to apply for the job. You then have to go through the interview process (if you get chosen) and sometimes that process can include tests. I hate tests. I can do everything on those tests perfectly, unless it is put into test form.

  It doesn't have to be someone says to you personally, it could be something on the news or a general social media post. Election time is a perfect example of this. There is so much negativity during election time (and after), it's hard not to feel bad or take some things personally when you see and hear them every day for months.

  You can't dwell on the negative stuff or it will just keep bringing you down. Sometimes, the people saying the hurtful things don't realize what they are saying is hurtful. They may not know that what they said hurt you or why. It's frustrating when someone close to you is the one saying the hurtful things since they know what you are going through. Most of the time, confronting the person doesn't help improve anything. Dwelling on their comments only makes you feel worse, so forget about what they said and focus on what you have been doing to improve or get through the hard times.

  Sometimes, you have to turn off the news and avoid social media. Remember when social media was full of funny cat videos? We need to go back to that. Pretty much the only thing I see when scrolling through my personal social media accounts is negativity about politics, race, religion, sports, school, jobs, everybody's horrible ex, and lots of other negative stuff. If you are already dealing with negative stuff in your head (like infertility issues, problems with school, job issues, etc.), seeing even more negative posts will make you feel worse and more confused. I think people were a lot happier, when everybody was posting funny cat videos.